4/10/08

Day 5378..

'Lord, break my heart of the things that break Your heart.'

Wow, wow, wow, wow. I can't think of many prayers more completely, earnestly committed than this. More than anything, I want desperately to be a vessel of honor, wholly and completely surrendered to Jesus. I want to be a conduit, a funnel that He continually pours through to touch people with His spirit. But am I brave enough to ask for a complete purging of my inner carcass on a daily basis?

Honestly, I'm not always open and vulnerable to His hands being buried in my heart, weeding out the ickily stuff I can be prone to hanging onto. Some days [ok, lots of days, since we're being open and vulnerable] I get stuck in selfish requests or daily grind things. It's so much easier to dwell on a plain where goodness and mercy follow me around and feed me frozen grapes, waving palm fronds and catering to my every need, than it is to dive deep into ME and willingly expose things that cause Jesus disappointment.

But that kind of walk isn't what my soul thirsts for [even though the palm fronds would kind of rock]; if I truly want to be a Funnel Christian for Him [I'm thinking of a theme song to 'Sunbeam' would work here, no?] then I must clear out the things in me that would inhibit the river of His anointing from flowing through.

So I'm asking Him to put His fingers deep into the soil of my soul, removing the roots of human feelings and emotions and replacing them with the things that He wants to see.

[Major props to whoever said this eloquent prayer first - there's some controversy over it, I hear, but Jesus love 'em, whoever 'em is - and to Jenn for reminding me of it. (o;]

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