4/30/08

Word Of The Day!

If you're an easily offended, left-wing nutcase acquainted with Gloria Allred and the ACLU, feel free to ignore this post. It is neither intended to offend nor offensive in nature to normal people.

So there. Smoke that, crackheads. ;o)

I'm from south Texas, y'all. Also known as Extended Mexico. If you're from south Texas, you're automatically Mexican by association, regardless of your heritage. Boom. That's the way it just is. Have a healthy respect for the elusive Chupacabra? Check. The ability to translate menu/billboard/telephone prompt items in Spanish? Check. Familiar with the ways of Mexican food? Check, check, check. You've gotta be an EM.

Being the Extended Mexican that I am, I find intense humor in the 'Mexican Word Of The Day' texts my friend Joe sends. They pretty much leave me chortling alone at my desk [where I'm supposed to be working, not texting, but don't tell me that!] which he likens to the cackling old lady on Nacho Libre. But whatev. *grin*

Here are my favorites. Don't worry - if you don't laugh, you're not from Extended Mexico.

Q: "What's the difference between 'choice' and 'choose?"
A: "A 'choice' is a decision you make. 'Choose' is something Mexicans wear on their feet sometimes."

Today's MWOTD [that's Mexican Word Of The Day, y'all. Stay with me!]:

Word of the day: "Wheelchair"
Usage: "Ey, Vato! Chu got the last tortilla!" "No worries, amigo, wheelchair!"

Yesterday's MWOTD:

Words of the day: "Liver" and "Cheese"
Usage: [spoken by the husband of a senora who has become the object of interest for an interested male passerby] "Ey, vato! Liver alone! Cheese mine!"





...And because I just saw this sign and I practically blew a gasket laughing at how fitting (?!) it is:



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Suuuuuunshine!

Sunshiii.. Sunsh.. Hello? *tap, tap*

Sunshine, this letter is for you.

I'm fighting bitterness as I type; I'm bound and determined to overcome my dismay at the snow flurries that decided to come out for a little victory dance during your absence.

Perhaps you were not aware, but today is April 30th. There are pictures of puppies frolicking in the golden glow of springtime on my 'April' dayplanner page, so I'm pretty sure it's past time for you to be here. Being the proactive person that I am, I have already discarded and/or packed every remotely warm and winter-worthy item of clothing I own, and it might be selfish, but I would appreciate not having to sit on a space heater all day.

Yes, indeed. Because of you, I'm roasting like a chicken over a fire-breathing space heater. My left leg does not like you right now.

You seem to be far too reluctant to join us this season. I'm pretty sure you're going to be merciless in July, because you tend to do that, but I'd hoped you would ease us into the May flowers my dayplanner assures me will appear. (I'm also expecting a basket full of floppy-eared puppies with ribbon bows around their necks, but I'm pretty sure you're not the one to ask about this..)

I'd consider it a personal favor if you would make an appearance in central Ohio. Nice and warm, something like a fresh cookie without the calories. The flowers would thank you, the puppies would frolic, and faith in dayplanners would be duly restored. Plus, I asked you nicely. I wrote you a whole letter, even!

Please and thank you. See?!?! I'm being nice already! ;o)

Signed,
ME

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A Beautiful Nail..



This gal cracks me up! She's definitely been to my nail place - I'm pretty sure Tammy is my homegirl. ;o)

The fabulous Ms. Johnson gets extra cool points because she loves Jesus. Folks, she has a knack for making people laugh AND she knows Who to give props to. Check her out on MySpace or Youtube or MadTV. Or whatev. ;o)

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4/29/08

Word!


I'm a desk-bound peon Tuesday-Friday, 9-4 Central, therefore, I am entitled to the knowledge of the vast network of time-wasting webpages. It's my constitutional right, I think. It's also my constitutional right to be busted because I laughed out loud in the middle of a serious meeting, but hey, you run your risks, right? I found ^ this guy ^ at www.picturesofwalls.com. Yes, seriously. They've thought of everything! ;o)


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4/25/08

What, more than others?

I know, it's awful. As thrilled as I am to be a real live blogger (because I feel like I should be considered that, whether or not I have a good blog going.. *grin*) I can't seem to keep up with it.
I'm stinkin' AWESOME at this, can't you tell? *grin*

I have valid (excuses) reasons for my absence, though; most of them involve my crazy busy life and schedule. Seriously, it's spinning and whirling almost too quickly for me to keep up!

Through all of the craziness that is my life, though, I'm picking up bits of inspiration everywhere. I always find cool things I swear I'll remember to blog, but only the really good stuff makes the cut. Y'know, it can only be the best for my genius readers. ;o)

Point in case - this awesome verse: "If you greet only the people you like, are you doing any more than others? The people who do not know God do that much. Matt 5:47 (NLV)".

I've heard twenty-something years of powerful, provoking sermons, and I've never heard anyone talk about this. I've heard kindness, fruits of the spirit, the Roman road, living a purpose-filled life, infusing passion into your walk, finding victory, and how to stay pure, among many, many other things. But never this.

It's straight from Jesus, y'all. He told the people sitting in His presence, who felt so surely that they had kindness down to a fine art, that they were really no better than publicans, a sector of society involved in extortion and sin. If you only hang out with your homies, you're in the same boat. Ouch.

You know the drill; you're sitting on a pew, waiting for the worship leader to bounce onto the platform and get the congregation movin' and groovin', when you lock eyes with A New Person. New Person gives a beseeching stare, and you offer an uncommited half-smile, willfully oblivious to the unspoken question in his or her eyes. Will you notice me? Will you talk to me? Will you listen to my heart? New Person's eyes seem to beg for notice, but you brush away the entreaty with a neat sidesweep of your gaze, ignoring the urge to make a friend. Be honest. You know you've done it - I've done it, too. G-u-i-l-t-y.

Solomon, the wisest guy ever (just don't ask his bazillion mothers-in-law!) wrote in Proverbs 18:24 that "A man who has friends must himself be friendly" - it leaves no room for questions, no possible place for an argument. Very simply, anyone who wants friends should start by being a friend to everyone he or she can reach.

I think it's much more important than an assurance that friendly people, by definition, acquire earthly friends. Some of the most mightily anointed vessels of the Old Testament were men who Jesus Himself called 'friend'. Wow. Hello, Abraham, father of the whole chosen nation of Israel; you were "called the Friend of God (James 2:23)". Hello, Moses, man who defied world powers to lead Israel out of captivity in broad daylight. Jesus talked to you 'face to face, as a man speaks to his friend (Ex. 33:11)".

Do you want to be His friend, in every sense of the word? Yeah? Ok, awesome. So prove it. What are you doing any more than others?

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4/11/08

Haiku, Bamboo, A Toodle-Oo!

Yeah, I become strangely affected by Veggie Tale-esque rhymes and rhythms at 2am.

Don't judge me. (o;

I have the best family in the world [hey, y'all!] and that wonderful family includes a precious baby-who-isn't-a-baby-anymore sister who has a phenomenal way of weaving words together and making them sound poetic.

Our gracious heavenly Father knows that she didn't learn this from me.

Here's a sampling of one of Leah's haiku(s? I'm so bad at this!):

A butterfly's wings
soft and fragile, like my heart
also born to fly.

You can read more at her brand-new poetry blog, http://www.alsoborntofly.blogspot.com.

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Happy Fashionable Friday!

I've got an awesome scripture that I'm currently mulling over and studying that I really want to tell you about, because it blew me away when I read it, as simple and direct as it is. Thanks, God, for making things new and real and relevant every day.

But I'm not done thinking about it yet, and other important things came up today; namely, the fact that I desperately need to go shopping. [I realize that shopping does not supersede Jesus, but follow along, people, just follow along..]

I'm trying to avoid shopping at all costs, because, well, it costs, for one. Not to mention, it's frustrating and time consuming and it makes my hair look like a blow-dried poodle from all of the on-off action with the tops and blouses and everything. [And trust me; heat-styled canine hair is NOT PRETTY!]



It's just a mess. But it must be done.


So I'm going to work up the nerve to do it eventually - well, actually, I'm probably going to be forced into it, since my clothes are rapidly becoming too large, but po-tay-to, po-tah-to. I'm going to pretend it's because of bravery. Or an epiphany. Whichever is more effective.


I looked at random [expensive] things online [that I cannot possibly afford] to see if I loved something, and the answer is yes. For one, I like this ridiculously be-bowed vest from Marc Jacobs [I'm ashamed to admit that I called him 'Marc Somebody' before] that reminds me of a frilly life-vest, if you can picture that.

I can, and I pretty much snickered through the next three notable clothing store sites [which will not be named, because I hear they have to pay you for that] at the thought of it.

Seriously, though, I refuse to pay $298 for something that is, at best, a partial shirt, but I made a solemn committment to Making An Effort At Fashion today [I did - I even typed it all out, just like that, title-text format and everything], so I'll have to keep looking.



Still. I would soooooooo wear that crazy thing. (o;

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4/10/08

This Is You!


Apparently, my blog is intended for genius readers, per 'The Blog Readability Test' [seriously, people, who knew?!?] which is probably designed for people who actually have reading audiences. [Hey, mom!]

Don't believe me? They give you a cute little badge to prove it.

I fully believe that anyone who reads my blog is genius, so you [yeah, YOU!] can bask in the glory of achieving prestige previously only attainable by the likes of Einstein, Kapka, and Bandura.
Not impressed? Oh, well. Great is your reward in heaven, anyway. (o;


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Check these kids out!

Y'all, I'm on a roll here. Seriously, move over, mayan chocolate ice cream! Blogging's my new favorite.

This video reminded me of the good ol' days, hanging out for literally hours on end - singing, playing [for those talented souls who could do all that] or just watching everyone else sing and play [oh, pick me!] in impromptu jam sessions, therefore, it had to be posted.

These kids have pretty good harmony, and they're doing one of my favorite songs, so you should listen. (o; Plus, I think it's hilarious that the one guy is singing with his backpack on. Seriously, folks, this is mad skillz. Those thangs ain't light! *grin*



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Day 5378..

'Lord, break my heart of the things that break Your heart.'

Wow, wow, wow, wow. I can't think of many prayers more completely, earnestly committed than this. More than anything, I want desperately to be a vessel of honor, wholly and completely surrendered to Jesus. I want to be a conduit, a funnel that He continually pours through to touch people with His spirit. But am I brave enough to ask for a complete purging of my inner carcass on a daily basis?

Honestly, I'm not always open and vulnerable to His hands being buried in my heart, weeding out the ickily stuff I can be prone to hanging onto. Some days [ok, lots of days, since we're being open and vulnerable] I get stuck in selfish requests or daily grind things. It's so much easier to dwell on a plain where goodness and mercy follow me around and feed me frozen grapes, waving palm fronds and catering to my every need, than it is to dive deep into ME and willingly expose things that cause Jesus disappointment.

But that kind of walk isn't what my soul thirsts for [even though the palm fronds would kind of rock]; if I truly want to be a Funnel Christian for Him [I'm thinking of a theme song to 'Sunbeam' would work here, no?] then I must clear out the things in me that would inhibit the river of His anointing from flowing through.

So I'm asking Him to put His fingers deep into the soil of my soul, removing the roots of human feelings and emotions and replacing them with the things that He wants to see.

[Major props to whoever said this eloquent prayer first - there's some controversy over it, I hear, but Jesus love 'em, whoever 'em is - and to Jenn for reminding me of it. (o;]

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4/8/08

The Beginning..

Ok, wow. It's already been a week [give or take a day or so, but who's counting?] since I stopped fighting the movement and became a bona-fide blogger, and I'm a little ashamed to say that it's taken me that whole week to try my hand at The Very First Post.

Perfectionism meets procrastination, and voila, I am created. No, really, it's true - and don't judge me, for it, either! You'd do it, too, if you knew how much fun it is.

A first blog is a little bit sacred; I don't want to begin what will surely become a journey of self-enlightenment and discovery by overstating the mundane and frivolous - nor do I want to start off by diving into a whirlpool of emotions and higher thought processes. It's a delicate balance of who I am as a person, what I discover as a child of God, and what I find on clearance.

See how complicated this is already? *grin*

If you know me [at all - I'm an open book, people!] you'll know that I've been anti-blog for almost as long as I've been an active member of the online community. [That makes me sound like I actually have something to do with the online community; truth be told, that really only means that I have a MySpace profile like almost every other human person on Earth.] I've even blogged about being anti-blog.

Seriously, folks - I was no joke on the anti-blogging frontier.

I have to admit, though, I'm in the process of reformation. I've encountered some pretty splendiferous [yes, yes that IS a word] blogs, and have to admit that the whole thing is cooler than I thought. I was surprised to find more than knitting projects, random rants, and recipes; blogs can be an interesting read and an amazing journey, all wrapped up in the cuteness that is a properly decorated [and twittered, although I'm still not entirely sure what that is] blog.

Who knew?!? Oh, you. Right. Okay, well, I'm still in the honeymoon phases of blogging, so please don't pop my joy bubble.

I'm pretty pumped about another benefit too; this is going to force me to faithfully journal those random inspirations that hit me during midnight popsicle runs [hey, now - I see you judging again!] and while zooming down the freeway, driving with my knees [not recommended, btdub].

So I'm beginning this crazy ride. I'm a little nervous about it, but I do hereby resolve to organize my thoughts as coherently as I possibly can. And to have fun. And to start on my New Year's Resolution list from 2004, but let's not go there.

Here ends the first post of a fairly normal twenty-something gal who loves Jesus, my family and friends, mango peach sweet tea, the beach, singing at the top of my lungs, and high heels... And here begins the thoughts and inspirations and little bits of nothing that strike my fancy.

You've been warned, folks. (o;

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